Sunday, October 05, 2008

Fun Monday - Storytime

Our lovely hostess this week is Mommy Wizdom and she gives us the following:

So, this is the assignment:

Themes to choose from:

A visit by your mother in law

Bedtime Stories

Raising a Teenager

The words: Ostrich, goosebumps, magazines, soup, cats, lethargic, noodles, tequila, doorknob, biscuit

Wild card words: prehistoric, Jedi Knight, cactus, periscope, humor

Your job is to write a story (true or made-up), poem, song, letter... whatever strikes you ABOUT one of the three themes. You must INCLUDE all 10 words. Wild cards words may be used in addition to or in place of the main 10 words.

Sounds fun, huh?

Here's my entry:

Riiiiing. Riiing. "Hello?" I answer the phone.

"Hello, Heather. How are you doing?" It's my mother-in-law.

"Just fine, thanks. How are you today, Sally?"

"Great, just great. I was out running some errands, you know, picking up some noodles for the soup I was going to make for myself for dinner tonight. And since I had to stop at the Food Mart in Naperville, I was wondering if I could stop by for a visit. I've got biscuits!" (That last sentence was said in a sing song voice.)

"That sounds great! Come on over," I reply as I silently swear to myself. I hang up with Sally and start running around the house trying to clean up. I shake the lethargy out of my head as I wipe down every doorknob with an antibacterial wipe. I grab all the magazines strewn on the kitchen table and pile them neatly in the basket under our end table. I clean up the cat's litter box to ensure that there are no lingering smells in the house. Finally, I grab the tequila from the fridge, take a swig, and paste a great big smile on my face.

Ding Dong. The doorbell rings and I open the door with a smile that would fool even the most honorable Jedi Knight. He will not feel a disturbance in the Force from me today!

Sally walks in and immediately turns my thermostat up three degrees. Her goosebumps are visible through her two layers and she shivers just a little. I again silently swear to myself that I should have turned the heat up. Oh well.

We sit down to a cup of coffee and Sally gets the biscuits out of her bag. They are looking a little dry and old, but I don't want to insult her, so I smile sweetly and dip one of the prehistoric rocks into my coffee. It softens only slightly.

After a long discussion about her latest crocheting project, the fact that her Christmas cactus is blooming in July, and her possible investment in an ostrich farm, (I talked her out of it) she got up and decided it was time to go.

We hugged goodbye and I told her to come again anytime.

This account is purely fictional and any resemblance to my actual wonderful mother-in-law is purely coincidental!


Anonymous said...

Amazing ! My Christmas cactus blooms in July, too. Maybe it's because I water it with tequila and feed it biscuits.
Please check "Aunt Louise's" HONOR at my place. It I need to correct/change something, let me know. Thanks for participating. My thoughts are with her and she has just been added to my SOS list...Sisters of Survival !

Alison said...

great story Heather. I am glad you added your Aunt Louise to Swampy's list, I am still praying for her!!

Anonymous said...

Ha! That was awesome! I loved your story... how wonderfully written!

Thanks so much for participating. I loved the part about there "he will not feel a disturbance in the force from me today."

Anonymous said...

Oops, I hit return too soon...

That last post was from me ;-)

IamwhoIam said...

Mine Christmas cactus is actualy a halloween cactus as it bloom in Oct and is orange. Lots of visits from fictional Mother-in-laws.

Gattina said...

Lol ! Instead of coffee you should have continued with Tequila, cheers !

Tracey9AD said...

FANTASTIC! My mother in law doesn't even make biscuits...rock hard or otherwise!

Sayre said...

Love the prehistoric biscuits!!! Those, I can definitely relate to! Great story!

Dr.John said...

I would have sworn the story was true. It seemed so real. Good writing.

NariceatL4 said...

Great story! Loved the part about the ostrich farm.
(And, I was guessing that you really get along well with your mother-in-law---I'm so happy you do---and that it was purely fiction. It's nice to have a good mother-in-law, biscuits or no biscuits!)

Tiggerlane said...

Very creative! Loved it!

Love the prehistoric biscuits - too funny! Great job!

Kristen said...

Hi Heather,
I wasn't sure how to contact you, but I wanted to let you know that you WON the Inspiration Board Giveaway that you entered on my Blog.
If you can contact me with your information, I'll get your package in the mail.
Thanks so much :)

Brendan said...

Finally I have an idea of where the little bottles of Tequila I always find in the recycling bin the day after my mom stops over for a visit are coming from.

I'm Toni said...

Great story! My Christmas cactus blooms all year!

karisma said...

LOL! That was very entertaining indeed!

Woodlandmama said...

Great job. I guess I'm the biggest loser here because I've never even heard of them let alone own one.

Woodlandmama said...

Christmas cactus that is.

Raven said...

What a great job with the words. I love the line about disturbance in the force. Well done. I agreed to do this and then forgot until the very last minute. But I posted something at last.

jsi said...

Hey, a Christmas cactus blooming in July is authentic conversation material. I would stop to listen to that, even without the help from tequila!
A cute, cute story - are you absolutely sure its fictional?

I put a poem up as well, Fred the Ostrich - check him out.

Anonymous said...

that is a great story!! I loved it